I thought they said two weeks. The humans are liars or I can’t do math or both. Probably both. Either way, the cone has been on too long. I am restless. I am eager to scratch and paw my ears. I am dying to lick my butt. Dying. Sometimes I bark at my own ass to let Mom and Dad know just how much I want to lick it.
There were chipmunks in the yard this morning so I followed Kita and enacted Chipmunk Protocol wherein we ran and jumped off the front stoop, while loudly alerting all area canines to the chimpunks’ presence. Then, because I wasn’t attached to Mom, I took off running. Then I had to sit down because my leg felt funny. Then Mom made me “come” and “sit” and “stay” and “down” for a while until she seemed happy with me listening. Then we went on our walk as normal.
Now, anytime I want to go outside, she puts me on the deck. I’m not a fan of it but only after I’m out there will she leash me up and then take me through the house on a leash to the front. It’s so weird. It’s like she doesn’t trust me at all.
All the while, Kita is leashless, running and jumping wild in the glory of nature and she doesn’t have a cone to stop her from getting all the good smells.
Then, for what appears to have been at least a fruitfly’s lifespan, Mom slept. She and Dad discussed how “only Sharon” would get the fever side effect of the tetanus shot she had to get and that she is “always lucky.”
Meanwhile, Kita and I are making plans for the impending Spring Barkening when all the animals start showing up on our property.
Mozzie is an asshole. Kita is no better.
My thumb hurts.
I feel like now I’m the whining one. I guess this is in solidarity?
Is it Wednesday yet?